Body Doesn’t Always Match the Magic: Dysphoria Among the Supernatural

When I wrote Dysmoonphoria, I was thinking about a younger me—the one who stood unsure, feeling super uncomfortable in my body and not knowing how to explain it to anyone.

The night I started testosterone by myself, I remember staring at my reflection, wishing for an instant transformation—something quick, something that would finally match the way I felt inside. But I knew realistically that some parts, like my hips, just wouldn’t change. My transformation wasn't going to be perfect or complete. It was slow, sometimes frustrating, and really personal.

Leo, the main character in Dysmoonphoria, deals with the same feelings. He's stuck between worlds—between who people see him as and who he really is. The way Leo shifts isn't wrong or not good enough; it's just real, exactly like my own journey.

I created Leo to show a truth about identity and transition that we don't see enough: everyone's transformation is different and valid, no matter how it looks. Leo’s pack doesn't really get him at first, which reflects the misunderstandings a lot of trans kids go through. But Leo has Rye, a friend who reassures him with, "You don't shift wrong. You shift real."

Representation matters so much, especially for young readers figuring out complicated feelings around gender and identity. With Dysmoonphoria, I wanted readers to know their experiences and feelings deserve to be seen, heard, and celebrated.

I always wanted to create a zine and have that authentic zine feel. But traditional zines often aren't visually accessible for me and others who need clarity to process visual information. Typical zine designs—crowded fonts, chaotic cut-outs, and busy covers—can be overwhelming. Accessibility means visual and mental clarity, something readable for braille users and inclusive for everyone. Am I sad it turned out differently? Not at all. I've always felt I wasn't traditionally inclined to do things—so why should this be any different?

This book is for every kid who's ever felt misunderstood, uncomfortable in their body, or hurt by labels that never fit. It's for anyone stuck between worlds, trying to find the courage to be exactly who they are. I see you. Your transformation is real and exactly right, just as you are.